The Dark Force Comic

Discussion in 'Comics' started by BenthekidRS, Nov 14, 2017.

?

Are you on the Dark Force server for updates?

Poll closed Dec 20, 2018.
  1. Yes

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  2. No

    25.0%
  3. You have a server based on this?

    75.0%
  1. BenthekidRS

    BenthekidRS Friendly Action Gamer

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    Page 1.png Page 2.png Page 3.png
     
    #1 BenthekidRS, Nov 14, 2017
    Last edited: Jul 26, 2019
    Ainn likes this.
  2. bluezemmi

    bluezemmi Busy

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    Bit late

    For starters.
    1. Save your comic file as .PNG and not as JPEG. If the comic is saved as .JPEG, then the quality of your comic will drop. [​IMG] [​IMG]
    2. You have text, but no speechbubbles. Some people can make it work without speechbubbles but they have a clear indication who is saying what in their comic. The text in your comic are barely readable. Light colored backgrounds and yellow text do not blend well. Use black text and white speechbubbles to make it readable.
    [​IMG]

    3. Your comic looks like a bento box. Everything is packed and close to eachother. Give your panels some spacing and different sizes. Not every panel has to be the same size. Try different sizes and shapes for the panels. As long as it is readable and the story is easy to be followed, it is good enough.

    4. You should try different perspectives instead of one point of view. All the action that is going on can be shown in different perspectives. Why not zoom in if Crypto is having a monologue? You made a panel where we see Crypto is sitting at the end of an edge. He is taking 1/3 of the panel, while 2/3 of the panel is taken by the background. Readers should focus on Crypto, not the background.

    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]

    TLDR: Save as PNG, Add speechbubbles, Panels are too packed and try different perspectives.

    If you need any help, feel free to ask me anything.
     
    Kat, Noz, Seth and 2 others like this.
  3. BenthekidRS

    BenthekidRS Friendly Action Gamer

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    I DID save as a .PNG.

    Well, I don't want MS Paint to make the speech bubbles for the comic to go over the panels.

    Doesn't that mean that I have to use templates for that?

    A monologue? Where do I find examples of those?
     
  4. bluezemmi

    bluezemmi Busy

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    No you did not. Otherwise the quality would not look so bad as now.
    Even the Deviantart link you gave says your comic is .JPEG format.
    [​IMG]

    I use Photoshop to make speechbubbles, but you can also use Paint.net. It is easier for beginners to work on.
    Leave GIMP behind because Paint.net is much better. You should use speech bubbles. Not everyone understands your comic as you do. If you want your comic to be read, make speechbubbles.

    [​IMG] Most editing programs have this in the toolbox. If they don't have that, you should make them yourselves with strokes. You do not need templates for panels. The scenes you make should also be made with your own panels. How else are you going to show the scene you want to show to the readers?

    http://maplemation.com/threads/the-nice-devil.31128/
    https://image.prntscr.com/image/yzP_Xlk-Qrq9JMrgsIkMow.png
    https://image.prntscr.com/image/kkbF6rxfSEOde8_MSOYgCQ.png

    With a simple search in Google, you can find monologues of various comics.
     
    Kat, Shulkle , Noz and 1 other person like this.
  5. bluezemmi

    bluezemmi Busy

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    Well done you've improved a bit. I'm glad you saved it as PNG and used speechbubbles.

    There are still some basic things you should improve.

    1. Different panels are great, but make sure the readers understands how your page should be read.
    This is how you made the comic.

    [​IMG]

    You can follow your story easily, but this is how we read your comic.

    [​IMG]

    I'm 100% sure people got confused reading panel 8 to panel 9.
    Make sure to allign your comics properly so we can read it easily.

    [​IMG]
    A rough edit of your comic.
    Ofcourse, this is not entirely perfect edited, but you should get the idea how a comic should be read.
    Double check yourself if it is readable or not.

    2. Make your pages bigger.

    Your pages are around 610 x 510 pixels. It's not a 4 Koma comic, This is not supposed to be a square.
    Give your page a rectangle form and make your panels bigger.

    [​IMG]

    You should be going for this kind of form of page. The size of this one is around 669 x 1195.
    No need to copy my size of page. It should be vertically larger than horizontal.

    Like around 500 x 700 or even 500 x 900.
    Check comic pages online to check their page sizes. Most action filled comics are in a rectangle form.
    And don't be scared to make your panels big. You just have to imagine how the scene should look like in the panel.

    3. This

    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]

    Crypto thoughts are barely readable.
    Give your text a white colour and black outline if you want to make the text readable.
    It works on any background.

    [​IMG] See the difference? The bottom is more enjoyable and clearer to read than the one without black outline.

    4. Stick with one colour with your thoughts.

    [​IMG]
    For some reason you changed your colour of your font, People get confused, just stick with one colour.

    The first page and second page also have that mistake. First page you use white as Crypto thoughts, but then it suddenly becomes black the next page.
    Not sure why you did that, probably to make the text readable, but you can just fix it with simple outling white words with black.

    5. Resize your scenes.

    Big panels that are enjoyable to read are great.

    You don't have to show everything from your character.

    [​IMG]
    Example

    In the first panel you see this unsettling guy with the text in the panel.
    Sure it is readable but there is so much space left.

    Second panel fixes the problem. Because you zoom in the character,
    it fills the panel more and the text is also readable.

    I use MS paint to resize my characters. It is easy and practical.
    [​IMG]
    There are other ways, but this is how I do it.

    Also use Paint.net. I can help you if you use Paint.net.
    GIMP sucks donkey ass and should never be touched again.

    Feel free to ask me anything if you need help.
     
    Seth and Ainn like this.
  6. BenthekidRS

    BenthekidRS Friendly Action Gamer

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    @bluezemmi Thanks for your thoughts, but I also use GIMP in my animations. I think you might've seen them before.
     
  7. Ainn

    Ainn ↻ Veteran Sprite Animator
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    @bluezemmi I was following along the CNC you wrote and soaking it in, then I started laughing when I saw the entirety of Ainn's day in two panels. I was so not prepared and now I'm crying.

    I actually came here to let you know that you can embed your comic images directly into the site by using this icon while writing your post.
    [​IMG]
     
  8. BenthekidRS

    BenthekidRS Friendly Action Gamer

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    Well, when I did it, the image didn't project into the comic.
     
  9. Ainn

    Ainn ↻ Veteran Sprite Animator
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    Oh, make sure to use the link! The links you have in the spoiler tag should work fine actually, but use one link at a time.
     
  10. bluezemmi

    bluezemmi Busy

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    1: Some texts in speechbubbles are too difficult to read.

    [​IMG]

    Do not make your font smaller than 12. It just hurts the eyes of the readers.
    There is a solution if there is not enough space for text bigger than 12.

    MAKE BIGGER PANELS.

    Seriously. I told you this in DM's and my past CnCs and you still haven't done it.
    Stop making small panels and expand your scenes already.

    [​IMG]
    The bigger the panel, thus the bigger your text.


    2: Your panels are too small (again).

    [​IMG]

    You know a fight is supposed to be one of the coolest things to view / read in comics?
    Why did this fight took 5 panels?
    This is an action comic right? Or should I read this as a comedy?

    Look what you can achieve in 5 panels.
    [​IMG]
    And thats 1/10 of the whole fighting comic.

    Make your fights longer. One of the best and fun scenes to work on are fights.


    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]

    3: Do not overuse panels for one move.

    People will get it what Crypto used after two panels.
    No need for one more panel.

    [​IMG]

    4: Don't overuse effects for your text.

    If you overuse effects or textures to your text, it creates a giant pile of mess.
    And no likes messy things.
    Keep it simple for giant text like that.

    5: Add sound effects.

    Please do add it after every attack/move.
    It feels so dull reading your comic without any sound effects.

    [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG]

    Please it is not that hard.

    6: Your chapter is too short

    [​IMG]

    An old comic series of mine has 16 pages for a chapter.
    You don't have to make 16 pages but a chapter usually contains more than 12+ pages.

    You have 4.

    Make your chapters longer please.
    I read your fanfictions and those chapters also consist of 25 sentences or something.
    Explain more about the characters in a chapter or make the fight longer to make a good chapter.
    This just feels rushed.

    7: Stop using MS Paint for speechbubbles

    Seriously that is the worst thing to do.
    Tons of people already recommended you to use Paint.net instead of GIMP or MS Paint.
    Stop ignoring that advice and use it already. It is one of best beginner programs to make comics with.

    https://www.getpaint.net/ Here is a link to the website.

    [​IMG]

    When you get on the website you press 'Download' with your cursor.

    [​IMG]

    After you press download you get sent to a different page of their website. In the middle you see a giant box that says 'DOWNLOAD NOW DOTPDN'.
    Click that to install Paint.net

    [​IMG]

    You'll be redirected to the next page. It will say 'To download, please click the FREE DOWNLOAD NOW link to the right.'
    On the right side you will see a link to the download called 'paint.net 4.0.19.'

    Now just unzip it and install it like you did with GIMP.

    Take this CnC as an actual help and improvement for you and not as an attack.
     
    Tra-La-Tracey, Neil and Seth like this.
  11. BenthekidRS

    BenthekidRS Friendly Action Gamer

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    @bluezemmi Just to recap...

    1. Bigger text
    2. Change my panel size
    3. One panel for one move
    4. Don't overkill the effects
    5. Place sound effects
    6. Extend the chapter
    7. Update the pages and create MORE pages with Paint.net
     
  12. bluezemmi

    bluezemmi Busy

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    1: Yes
    2: Yes
    3: No, charge attacks can be done two panels. One panel for one move most of the times can cause confusion for the next panel.
    4: Yes
    5: Yes, the sound effects like 'WHAM' 'BAM' 'THWACK' as in text size, not actual sounds.
    6: Yes
    7: Ditch Gimp, Use Paint.net
     
  13. Seth

    Seth Proxy

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    Not comic-wise CNC but rather plot-wise CNC for your next chapter.

    1st of all, the reason as to why Crypto joined the dark forces and obtained his powers is too... ''bland?'' Like i get that a guy died and he transferred his powers to him, but for what reason exactly? And why did he join the dark forces? Did somebody ask him to? Did he just did it on his own? Is it something that you're planning to explain later? How did he even know the existence of the ''Dark forces''? And most importantly, how does he even know their members? Well, you probably did some sort of time-skip in the comic at some point without anybody really noticing, you can fix this later, or keep it as... messy as it is. People just want an acceptable reason for people to do things, doesn't matter if it's stupid or not, as long as it makes enough sense.

    2nd, Crypto's father. This really confuses me, for many reasons. 1st, why are the dark forces even targetting his father? Was it because they're doing Crypto a favor to help him take his revenge? If that's the case you should've atleast explained that, or was it because he's important in some way? Maybe he holds an object or power of incredible value? and 2nd, in the scenes, you made Crypto look as if he is really powerfull due his training and powers, then why, a normal human with no special qualities whatsoever is supposedly stronger than Crypto? He's even able to withstand his attacks without being torn apart, like wtf. Makes me think that his father might actually be some sort of really powerfull ex-adventurer or something.

    3rd, and the worst of all, the 4th wall break.
    At this point i was still enjoying the comic until you suddenly made a 4th wall
    break, where you said ''What the hell?'' ''Whatever, this is just a comic dude'' or
    something like that, dude, like, huh. What was the point of that 4th wall break?
    Did i miss something? i didn't notice anything weird for you to have done that, i
    found it really bothersome. I hate it when a person justs completely destroys the plot within
    just a few seconds by making a joke they thought it would be funny.

    Now just a few little things that aren't related to the plot...
    1st, was the Dark forces's HQ background image a goddamn solar panel?? Like wtf is that background?
    2nd, Please, JUST GET A BETTER PROGRAM TO MAKE COMICS. Paint.net, whatever, just anything else as long as it's not ms paint or something really old and outdated like that. Stop making those terrible speech bubbles, you can just add text with filters instead.
     
  14. BenthekidRS

    BenthekidRS Friendly Action Gamer

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    @Seth5443 Well...

    1. When Crypto met Emperor Solitude and he told him his struggles, he figures to use him as a new member for the Dark Force. So, it's like a 50/50 answer to both your questions and will be answered in the new edition of the Dark Force Intro.

    2. Crypto is after his dad ONLY. The REST of the Dark Force is after the Resistance. Now, later on throughout the chapter, he joins the Resistance. I'll also explain Mr. Shadow's relationship with Solitude.

    3. I wanted to add some humor in that, so that's why I added the 4th wall joke. My biggest apologies if it bothered you a bit.
     
    #14 BenthekidRS, Jan 1, 2018
    Last edited: Sep 11, 2018
  15. BenthekidRS

    BenthekidRS Friendly Action Gamer

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    UPDATE!!!

    I'm going to go slow this time. I'll be sure to write the novel versions of the comics that I PLAN to get out. This way, I can plan out how my comics can be made.
     
  16. BenthekidRS

    BenthekidRS Friendly Action Gamer

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    Bad news! :(

    I unfortunately don't have comic programs. So, until I find one, this comic is on standby.
     
  17. BenthekidRS

    BenthekidRS Friendly Action Gamer

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    NEW PAGES OUT, BOIS!!!! (And a new chapter.)

    Page 1.png Page 2.png Page 3.png Page 4.png
    Page 5.png [​IMG]
     
    #17 BenthekidRS, Mar 5, 2019
    Last edited: Dec 24, 2020
    Seth likes this.
  18. BenthekidRS

    BenthekidRS Friendly Action Gamer

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    New pages!

    [​IMG]
     
    #18 BenthekidRS, Sep 18, 2021
    Last edited: Mar 24, 2022
    Poke likes this.
  19. Poke

    Poke Boomer

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    Dang, 2 years later! Weirdly can't see the image unless I try replying to it.
     
  20. BenthekidRS

    BenthekidRS Friendly Action Gamer

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    Perhaps if I don't mark the pages as spoilers?