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Discussion in 'Comic Galleries' started by skillzicee, Dec 29, 2010.
this is amazing c:
I wonder who's better at making comics.
Philip or Levi?
^Don't answer this question, the truth hurts :sadfais:
I just love this series. So much mystery packed into one single comic strip
i really love first person perspective and flashback (or dream)
i can see few mistake (maybe you couldnt be bothered with it)
then map mislinement need to be fixed it's kinda off by 3~6 pexel
and stroyline is epic !!!
I jizz in my pant:lulululu:
yeah...i noticed the misalignment now. i prob did it in the update i just put up since i didnt read your comment until now. better next time hopefully...
PART 006 IS UP...
Nicely done, though I do have a small list of CnC
- At panel 9, the girl stayed at the same spot as the previous panel when they're walking.
- I really don't like how you use the same walking pose throughout the panels, use variety of the sequence~
- This isn't necessary, but at panel 8, you could put the words "Meanwhile..." so you know the scene changed during the same time period.
- Try to test out different panels instead of using squares/rectangles. It's always awesome to have variety.
Cinematics COULD be a bit better, but it's nothing big, just my personal taste. Keep up the good work~
Twixer, best CnC i've gotten on this series so far.
-panel 9, i agree. def will do better next time
-walking poses, i see that now. and there shall be more variety
-panel 8, i thought of that... idk why i left it out, lol
-as for square/rectangular panels, i've been testing it out, and i dont want to jump right into it just yet, but my panel arrangements, sizes, etc. will change in the future.
and i agree with u on the cinematics. i have a lot of room for improvement
I feel like you've gotten sloppier :(, it's either or this issue. The only problem that I have is the sfx, yes I know I've been on your ass lately about this.
could u actually give me CnC on the sfx? or how u would go about it? it'd help a lot.
and theres no denying it, the last two issues have been sloppier than the previous ones. and thats because of stress from classes and finding time to work on these. i just have a lot of ideas stirring that i get impatient to put them out there. and i did notice its affecting the quality. but i guarantee the next part, i've been taking my time on it. sorry guys :/
I would say something about sfx, but I don't know what exactly about sfx you need CnC on, so I'll leave that to Tom since he probably knows better. D:
And I don't think it's so much as sloppy as compared to your others, it feels a bit bland and simplistic.
The only thing I would consider even the slightest as sloppy would be how you organized what's going on for this chapter. The transitions are slightly awkward and it actually makes your comic feel a little rushed plot-wise and visual-wise.
It also might be because there's not as much info revealed in this chapter. Add that to the feeling of being rushed (kinda?) while reading it, and, maybe it's just me, but I feel like there was potential in this chapter that was missed. But you gave an explanation covering most of what I said already, so not really any new CnC here...
CnC nonetheless, and useful one at that. thanks a lot! i appreciate it
http://www.examples-of-onomatopoeia.com/ this site helped me a lot
Spoiler: This is what I would've done
Usually when there's an action that is happening I stop and think, "What sound effect do I need". Not only that it helps readers what's going on and it also kills some empty spaces.
What I recommend doing is that whenever you're making an action scene think of the sounds it would make in real life. Add the text close to the action, I prefer it being above. After that, it's pretty much your style. My style of sfx is the word doing the same as the scene. Let's say that I'm flying through the air, I would use "Wooosh" as my sfx. Now, just having "Woosh" is boring so I'm gonna use the text wrap and use the wave effect. My character is motion blur'd to signal that he's moving, then I'm gonna motion blur my text to match the action.
You're a really good comic maker, very good story, structure and effects. You're just missing the little stuff. Really hope this helped. Good luck on the next issue!
P.s moved to gallery
this is awsome i loved it i dont think you could have made it better. The art befor ethe comic was cool except for the guys hat it looks pretty dull compared to the sprite's hat
added part 007. im gradually working on defining my style of making comics. im happy with part 007, but i know im still playing around with new things. enjoy. thnx all for the CnC.
Much, much better than before. The little details like the blood really picked this issue up.
I'm just glancing, but at the moment, the only things I have any real issue with are panel 13 (bzzzzt panel), panel 28 (facial expression after yellow gal's aerial attack), and the sound effects.
Panel 13; Not really understanding where that guy came from. Comparing the map placement, it looks like he's to the right of the main action. Also, the electrical effect bothered me since it just stands out so much, probably because it's unshaded or something. Also, a glow on it might contribute to the electrical effect, but idk...
Panel 28; Probably just me, but I found the facial expression comical rather than surprised or whatever. Also, the direction of her eyes looks like she's facing forwards rather than upwards.
Sound effects are pretty good. Although when I work with sfx, I go for a more uniform style (One font, one text style, etc.), I think your varying sound effects match your comic style well. However, perhaps it's personal preference, but words of caution on the colors you choose for your sound effects. Some of your sound effect colors match wonderfully well (Last panel, CRASSH) but others are kinda on the border (Panel 13, bzzzzzt).
But overall, a major improvement from the last chapter. (:
for panel 13, he was attacked mid air, and fell to the right of michelle. if u notice in the panel before how they all rush in from four different directions. it is a little unclear though.
and most of the improvement was due to the recent CnCs i've been getting, and looking closely at other comics like yours, Zatrox, and... Tom :xcal:
Been busy lately with stuffz and several comic ideas, but I'll start working on them when I have time :>
Big improvements young Jedi, my personal favorite is panels 7-11. Jackie already said what I was gonna say, great job C:
Very nice improvement indeed, love how you took my advice and used more variation on the panels~
Nice! Keep them coming